As they say that going back to work after a long leave is like going back to reality of life, but going back after giving birth is like leaving a piece of you every time you leave your house.
I wanted to share my tips since I just gave birth last February to my second child, and just been advised that I need to return to work a day from now. My mind is troubled on how can I handle the separation anxiety building up, especially that I am still breastfeeding my baby.
We working mothers would feel burdened to leave home to work. For me it feels like I’m committing a sin every time I leave, even if it is just for groceries or such, so leaving for almost 12 hours away from home is like a mountain inside my chest.
Here are some tips on how to get over the separation anxiety, I did this to my first baby and intend to do it again. Please do consider since not all of us are the same as well as our kids.
- Leave your used clothing near baby
– as old people say that when you do this your scent will be with your baby. As we all know that babies know their mothers scent and will look for it especially when feeding, and sometimes sleeping. By leaving your used clothing behind, you are at ease that your baby will not miss you too much since he/she can still smell your scent. This saves us from worrying that our baby might not feed since they are searching your scent.
- Provide more attention to your baby hours before you go.
Providing much attention makes your baby at ease and think that you won’t leave. Believe me, our babies know that we are leaving even if we don’t tell them. Giving the needed attention to your baby before you leave will satisfy them from wanting you to be by their side. It is normal that on the first week of you leaving for work will be hard for your baby and yourself, practice makes permanent so just keep on doing things that you did when you were on maternity leave.
- Don’t carry or touch the baby 2 hours before you go
– as bad as it sounds this will help you and your baby not to feel the separation anxiety before you leave for work. This also helps your baby not to be so dependent on you. Just think of it as a lesson to be independent.
- Don’t force pump
– this goes to those who are also breastfeeding like me, since as I mentioned above, babies know when we are leaving, they will demand more attention and will be draining out the milk from you. If you can’t pump anything mor than 2 oz. Please do mix feeding! It is not a sin to do mix feeding, rather than forcing yourself in pumping and denying your baby proper feeding. Babies need to double their weight before they can sleep. You can always breastfeed your baby when you get home, just make sure to get at least 30 minutes rest before doing so.
- Plot your schedules
– babies have routines, they should still be followed accordingly. Babies will look for the same routine especially if they are doing it ever since the beginning. They will be looking for the same thing every day so it is better to jot down what you are doing everyday and leave it to whoever will be taking care of your baby.
- Look for a closer job
– it might be hard, but it is better to be closer to your home so that it would be easy to access your house. It would also be better to look for a home based job so you can take care of your baby and not leave. I have tried to look for a home based job while on leave l, but I guess my luck was not enough to get one 😦
Parenting is not easy, all parents knows that. First time parents might have doubts and inhibitions that they can juggle all things while taking care of their babies. I am not an expert on this but believe me you can do anything possible. You just have to have a proper mindset on what to do and pray always, as for guidance.
Everything that is happening has a reason, don’t go around looking for that reason, instead accept it and move on.